He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
