sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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