i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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