Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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