We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
