I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
there is glitter all over my balls
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
