Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
