no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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