I have demons in me.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
so let's talk penis.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
