you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
