He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
