the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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