I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
