whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
