I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
