Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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