doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
