Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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