Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
