Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize