you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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