hotel room ftw
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
