so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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