ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
