508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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