i just wanna soil my oats bro
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
