And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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