trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
it hurts more in the daytime
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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