i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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