Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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