Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
