singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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