and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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