I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Randomize
