Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
