"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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