I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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