I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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