Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize