If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
