I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
my being single is dangerous.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
