1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
