Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
