you traded sex for a burrito?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
