do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
no. you can't hotbox the world.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
