What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You need a sexual gate keeper
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
