found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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