I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
