I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
