a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
