If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
