so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
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